nothing tight i'm going to stuff myself with food and alchy
I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
i called my mom using *69 and said this was the principal and Matt has a snow a day today. she believed me.
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
I'm heating up a hotdog using a candle.
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
I knew it was gonna be weird when she opened the condom with scissors
No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today.
This place smells like bottom shelf liquor and broken dreams
I'm pretty sure every guy I've been with this weekend has made a solid attempt at getting me pregnant...
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
Randomize
