honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
whats up tonight?
Ice cream, wine, and teabags... Not the earl grey kind
Can Purell be used as lube?
Booty call?
Dude you don't even follow my twitter
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
Even my vagina gasped.
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
Just woke up with an eye that wont open, a half eaten piece of pizza on my chest and a raging boner.
I just woke up in my locked bathroom. It's 5 PM. What happened?
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
i need to get drunk because i'm an angry sober
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
Randomize
