i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
FB needs to have a relationship status called...screwing my roommates bf..linking their names would be an easier to tell her!
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
"Every minute you spend hanging out with David is a minute you could spend meeting someone new, who isn't a huge douche" - Buddha
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
Flacco has been sacked like 7 times. His name also auto corrects to Flaccid. That's so sad
I just tried to brush my hair with a can opener. Who gave you that brownie
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
THEN YOU WILL NOT GET TO SEE MY TITS TONIGHT OR IN THE NEAR FUTURE YOU HEARTLESS BASTARD
My mom just asked me about the teeth marks on my headboard..
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
Jus had a dream that I borrowed bob dylans car to save us from a pack of raptors. Pretty stoked about it.
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
Im so fucked up I'm drinking baileys and coffee just to stay awake.
It's 6 in the afternoon?
One can only be this extremely wet once a year and I feel like I'm bitch slapping god by not using this gift he has bestowed on me.
Randomize
