that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
Totally just grabbed the wrong dick. Damn this tequila.
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
No room in fridge, chilling wine in snow. Do NOT let the dog pee on it.
Just had a stripper snatch my glasses off my face with her ass
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck?
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
So shaving my butt whilst humming "be prepared" is now in my top five weirdest Friday night activities.
You had all day to plan ahead & get mixers, so whose fault is this sobriety?
Randomize
