I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
I lost my phone so I put sticky notes all over my roommates body asking her to wake me up at 7:00 AM.
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
I woke up with hair in my teeth and half his beard was missing.
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.
Oh at the liquor store again?
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
I woke up this morning and I had the absolutely horrific realisation that I am the human incarnation of scrappy doo
The bottle brush for the bong worked really well to clean the brownies out of the waffle maker.
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
You’re going to be a doctor, and I’m going to be a trophy wife. We both have goals
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