Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
Just woke up. First thing I see: Little brother eating last night's jello shots thinking they're reg jello.
True life I used my fake as a photo id for my final. My professor told me good luck and laughed. Hope the bouncers are in the St. Patrick's day spirit.
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
you were fixing your hair in the bathroom mirror and then fell backwards through the locked stall while she was in mid pee and fell on her lap.
Not enough. Tell the person next to you to give you their drink. I give you permission. And then chug it. Be a hero tonight.
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
You were a cyclone of alcohol and bad decisions - like a gay Tazmanian devil
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
Randomize
