Do u think I can claim pregnancy as an accident so my insurance covers it?
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
25 People Confess The Biggest Betrayal They Have Ever Faced
We left an ass print on the piano.
I automatically know you're drunk now as soon as you start yelling in spanish
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
We found you naked curled up in a ball in the closet, using a gorilla suit as a blanket
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
25 Odd Things These Pathetic People Do For Enjoyment
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
Just used an eyelash curler to open my beer since I didn't have a bottle opener. Things are starting to look up.
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
Got to use the phrase "sweet pukas dude." My day is made.
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
I'm trying to watch Chicago PD and tell you I like your dick at the same time. It's a lot of work, ok?