Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
Was just shown the photos from a professional photoshoot my aunt had for their dog...not drunk enough for this...
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
one of my coworkers is shitshow drunk, getting naked. she's about to ride the bull.
i was just going to ask if it would be cool for me to come and have a beer...
it's total chaos here. i may ride the bull... i'll be visible.
I mean I'm forever immortalized as the one who puked in his dad's straw hat.
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
Passed out in a rocking chair on her porch. Woke up to the tow truck taking away my car.
No...this little piggys going to the bar
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
Just walked by a girl saying to her friend "honestly you coulda given me any dude and I woulda fucked him"
You should've introduced yourself
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
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