he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
I woke up face down on my laptop with three windows open: itunes, chat roulette and redtube
Drunk on an escalator. I fell like 15 flights of stairs without actually moving more than 5 feet.
Can you do me a favor and fuck someone with a car so I can get a ride home?
You passed out in my bathroom last night. I put a towel over your face so I could shit without it being gay
Which genius got me a voicemail of myself puking?
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
We had him convinced Visine is flammable. He was genuinely freaked out that everyone would know when he was stoned.
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
I'm on someone's yacht. I don't know who. But I'm on it. There's a guy passed out in a kilt holding bagpipes. Help.
Randomize
