Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
she's like the human form of herpes, as soon as you think she's gone for good you have another out break.
My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
I'm officially my mother.. Smoking in the garage pretending to take the dog out in a big ugly jacket
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
It's just my hair. It brings natural happiness. Like goldfish, big boobs, and milkshakes.
just had a very awkward conversation with the concierge at the hotel, they threw your underwear out
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
My boob is missing a layer of skin
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
Randomize
