hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
Know what was probably a bad idea? Using white wine as a mixer for vodka.
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
So how was the sex with me last night?
No worse than usual.
Just broke into a house and crawled through a window. Upside: getting laid.
If you fall asleep, my vagina and I will never forgive you.
Then we woke up and they shouted "Emergency Vodka!!" and that's how we got redrunk.
I've needed to start drinking protein shakes to keep up with her. It's like my dick just started doing crossfit.
she started chasing me through the forest like a horny serial killer
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
Randomize
