Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed
All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
Hey when I die alone will you come by often enough so that my cats don’t eat my face?
I had sex with billy mayes last night. HE KEPT IN CHARACTER THE WHOLE TIME.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drunk fuck. Had to tell him that the 5 second rule does not apply when your in the bathroom at the hockey game.
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
I have a critically important question to ask.
Why does watermelon-flavoured candy exist?
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
Our innocent game of 'Duck, duck, booze.' ended up not being so innocent
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
Did you leave a mouse under my pillow again?
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
I've scurried myself in your trunk come find me in the morning
Randomize