State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
im lying in bed trying to choke myself out because being awake hurts too much
I can control the tv with my phone while pooping on the second floor. I thought you should know for future reference
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
My mom just asked if I wanted a mimosa when I got out of the bath.
I think everything's gonna be okay.
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
Randomize
