Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
He kept asking me to take off my bra and I sat up so he could. He fumbled with it for a few minutes and when I sighed and went to undo it he goes, "Yeah, you got this."
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
if drunk means calling me and asking to borrow the game of life at 2am then I think you were drunk
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
Speaking of boners I learned how to say " jizz everywhere" in sign language
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
Randomize
