Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
I walked downstairs and there were 50 sorority girls. I wasn't expecting an audience during my walk of shame.
sometimes when i'm drunk i choose the spanish option on the ATM to challenge myself.
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
I'm here to help build your repertoire of drunken shenanigans and I should have been arrested stories
Just drank an entire bottle of champagne for lunch. It's gonna be that kind of semester.
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
Last night you told me to stop being Martha Stewart and asked if I had Taco Bell in my house
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
Randomize
