Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
My cha cha got a haircut
thank god. going down on you was like chewing on astroturf
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
Can you give me a hickey quick? Im going to a white trash themed party. Completely serious
Have you ever had one of those moments when you kept whispering to yourself "I'm not a slut, I'm not a slut..."?
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
Then she said I give the best mouth hugs and bar went silent.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently she broke up w/ her bf like 3 weeks ago. She actually called me to be her bday hookup cause she's single now. Patience- the virtue that occasionally pays off.
Just set myself on fire a little bit. Made me think of you.
What happened to fro yo and sex?
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
This is the third time I have overheard parents tell their children "don't be that girl" in reference to me. I'm either doing something horribly wrong or amazingly right
I’m making a jello mold of my penis
Will it be as disappointing as your actual penis?
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