Two words Indian burn...
What did she think it was, a shake weight?
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
After she came with my hands around her neck, she sat there for a minute and gave me the scuba diving sign for a-ok.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It could have went better. They kicked us out of the casino and I drunkenly whipped her across the face with a fishing pole. Long story.
Either I need to stop bringing you back to my apt or I need to stop buying ikea furniture
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
Our lady landlord called. Dot worry, I handled it. Drunk. Tell her it was Nate. Done. Good. Bye. Drunk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
I'm drunk still and I cried and now I'm watching Whitney Houston singing the national anthem and I'm crying more
Fuck it, I'm going to make my own dick pic album since iOS 10 won't do it for me.
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