You really coming over, don't trick.
You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
waking up outside has become so normal, the paper boy knows to set the paper next to me
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
We found Kyle. He was next door yelling at the elderly couple to let him continue his golf game. No more afternoon drinking for him.
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
Uh, he still talks to you after you basically sexually harassed him using emojis?
Will you bring a case of beer down to the hot tub? Me and Phil don't want to feel feelings anymore
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
Randomize
