It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
I just walked in on my mom and dad......It wasn't my dad
Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
don't tell her this, but while we were doing it doggy style I picked up my phone and changed my status to "who let the dogs out"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
Okay. I really need to get out of this guys bed and get home. It's two in the afternoon. He's not even HERE.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just did the math. It is, in fact, cheaper to go out drinking every weekend than it would be for me to pay for a legitimate therapist. What are you doing next Friday night?
Really?!? Does he think blocking me on FACEBOOK means that he doesn't have a kid with me?!
just woke up on a lounge chair wearing a durag and holding burrito wrappers in my hands
God damn. You sleep with one 40 year old married dude and suddenly you have “daddy issues”. Fuck all of you.
I’m sorry I got high and yelled about the patriarchy.
I feel awkward having to tell people “sorry you can’t finger me because I will get a UTI and I don’t have health insurance”
Randomize