Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
for our anniversary he stepped it up a notch and bought cool whip rather than the store brand. i was impressed.
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
it was like he was trying to blow his nose in my vagina
I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
I came back and almost ran over two people passed out in my driveway I've never met before in my life
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
Randomize
