It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
Shiiiit I think I'm getting sick. probably had something to do with the fact that i shared my mouth with everyone last night.
Wait. That came out far sluttier than I intended.
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
The only downside so far to having a guy roommate is that when he's doing a walmart run, I just can't bring myself to ask him to pick up a pregnancy test for me. I feel like that's just too much too soon.
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
Some guy in the bathroom just took his shirt off and proceeded to tell me the story behind all of his stab wounds. That's what I get for making small talk
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
Would it be irresponsible to use my tax refund for a boob job?
Yes. Highly encouraged though.
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
It's starting to get sad how I have this 'new beginning' feeling after every negative pregnancy test
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