dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
somehow on my way home with matt, I ended up straddling steve on the sidewalk and polling the people walking by on whether or not we should have sex.
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
My mom just called hysterical. She and her sister found my dead grandma's vibrator.
The apple don't fall far from that tree.
How'd the date with the redheaded dentist go?
She didn't like my gingervitis joke
He has a British accent. He could read me the phone book and I would come so hard he would need a wizened old man in a rowboat to save him.
Where the fuck are you? I just got punched in the nose by a tourist
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
Randomize
