I wish there were whore gnomes that cleaned our apartment when we were gone.
i wanted a birthday blowjob. not a birthday VD.
The professor just announced to the class that I talked to him in the bar on my birthday.
shes in my pool wearing only floaties on her arms ill have to raincheck watching march madness with you guys sorry
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
Thanks for letting me in last night. I was drunkenly sleepwalking.
I have way too big of a thanksgiving food baby to enjoy any of my old high school booty calls
Blow job season was short but glorious.
You're finding a boat, I'm going to sleep with a guy that lives above a bar and has 24 hour access. We are really nailing this adulting thing
And you seriously thought you could just walk in naked with a bow tied around your penis?
It seemed like a good idea at the time...
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
Randomize
