Just saw cops pull over the ice cream truck. What a dick
I woke up this morning naked, with a to-go box from Qdoba, an entire meal completely untouched. I have been piecing together my night to find some answers. I feel like Nancy Drew.
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she said, "is it ok if I touch it?" that's when I knew I was in trouble... I knew she was a virgin but seriously..
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
That moment when you cant decide between eating spaghetti or a Popsicle for breakfast
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah so then I used the selfie stick his mom gave me to take nudes
the bouncer just handed me a Starbucks bag of pound cake
Either my apartment is haunted or I'm far more drunk than I thought
I'm sorry my shit is everywhere... I accidentally got drunk while packing
I’m on my third beer doing poppers in the shower to no doubt
Look fucker, my sensibility and attention to detail is the ONLY REASON you're not dead now
Randomize