that's an acceptable place to lick
I just want you to know I tipped the cab driver $10 last night because I felt bad that he didn't have healthcare.
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
What did you wear last night? Because I'm pretty sure there are atleast 4 Facebook statuses about your walk of shame.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
I just did a sobriety test in a tutu.
I swear to God, if you drunkenly correct my grammar one more time, I'm cutting you off.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I haven't been this unsober in a long time. I feel like I am observing myself. Like I am a test subject for alcohol. I wish my brain would shut up and let me be a normal drunk.
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
Have you ever eaten pizza and gotten your dick sucked at the same time? Because I have pizza.
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
Randomize