Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
I mean this holiday was built on cheap beer, shitty whisky, and processed meat... and I fully plan to honor that
If I die I am blaming you for not answering to tell me the proper dosage of horse tranquilizers to take
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
Do you think I threw out my left shoulder during the keg stand or the stripper pole? It's medically relevant my chiropractor wants to know.
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
I thought you died. Don't forget it's burger night.
Went as "Party on, Wayne." And left as, "Partied out Wayne in a foot boot with new medical bills." Fuck Halloween...and vodka.
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
Randomize
