I'm like a rollypolly, I only open my legs up when I feel safe.
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
Just had to explain to a senior manager why I had duct tape residue on my wrist and hand. This weekend was a success.
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
Your mom just threw up on me. Please come home.
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
they fed me a peach. i was laying on the floor telling them how beautiful they were
I keep telling myself last night was not real, not real, not real. Then I remember I can't move. This hangover is too fucking real.
When did angry sex become our thing?
I broke a glass at the bar and ended up with blood on my forehead. I apparently kept screaming BLOOD like the little boy in that YouTube video.
I just threw up vodka and hot dogs in a handicapped stall with someone in it who couldn't make me leave because he couldn't walk.
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
My husband has seen you naked more times this week than me. I don't consider it a bad thing since you keep bringing the booze to our house. And because my tits are bigger.
Randomize
