So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
Wtf. Who made this Big Mac, Helen Keller?
where does the pee come out of this thing
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
the level of his annoyance + every insult he makes = the closer I am to telling him im fucking his ex
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
I got tossed from adult league soccer for telling a 55 year old I'd break his hip. I'm a productive member of society
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
Just got offered cocaine at ihop. Stay classy America.
My Sexting was not on an AP level
Normally getting fucked up with the owner and suggesting he motorboat me wouldn’t help my chances of a promotion, but this is 2020 and he definitely enjoyed it
Randomize
