I tried to use my car keys to open my door
I just started a sentence with yellow.
Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
You don't understand how difficult it is to give head with cotton mouth
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
I know how I'm going to make my fortune.. designing an icepack made specifically for the vagina.
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
Captain Morgan does not know self control. Nor does he teach it.
Morning! Im using your rent money to snort percocet.
I just bought sparkling water with plan B. I am the most basic bitch to ever exist.
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
Randomize
