I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
Never let Scott cook bacon and eggs at 2am while drunk. You should have seen the flames.
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
If we worried less about pouring champagne down stripper crack, we probably wouldn't skip so many meals.
Ok I'm good with that cause I'm gonna disappear for 90 days
Are you goin to rehab again?
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
Randomize
