The only reason you're wearing underwear tonight is cause you have a family dinner before
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
Also, at 1:30 I emailed myself saying, "are you there Margaret? It's me, god"
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
Carpe scrotum. Grab life by the balls.
I now own a bag of cigarettes and have no purse, awesome
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
I went through my entire iTunes library and made a playlist called "Feelings". I have 7.5 hours of feelings.
Our group of friends now have more broken bones than reasonable excuses for why they're broken.
It's gotten to a point that when guys say "I'm gonna cum" I've developed a habit of responding "dooo itttt" in a deep voice. #isthatweird
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
Randomize
