I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
I ate one of your animal crackers. just one. ok four. but no frosting. ok frosting.
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
Is it rude if I ask the current tenets of our future apartment if I can come and blackout for a night? I want stupendously drunk me to get a feel for the place so he's comfortable when we move in.
There was a guy on the elevator dressed as santa in flip-flops giving away beer.
Nothing like wearing your heels and smelling like henney in the afternoon
Covered in confetti and bad decisions
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
No one suspects that a sweet girl who is excited about her anniversary with her bf just blew her partner at work in a communal area a few hours ago, so its cool.
...and that's why girls with IBS don't paint their nails
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
I want to disappear from this job like a fart in the wind.💨
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