i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
I looked her in the eye and told her I was 'balls deep' in love with her...She said that wasn't saying much. Time to drink away the sadness...
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
The bride says you won't want any of the single ladies...
Let's let the open bar be the judge of that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just said "I love my cat" as a hobby.
If you keep giving me that glorious dick ill bake you some cookies
WTF was I supposed to tell them? "hi mom and dad, this is some rando I met on the internet. please ignore the noises that will be coming from my bedroom for the next 60-90 minutes. kthxbye."
Sorry I wasn't opportunistic about sucking your dick in an Uber last night
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
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