Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
I have to look really hot tonight because my personality is going to suck.
new low, i just stole money from my 5 year old sister to buy condoms
I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
Im done having sex . he ruined it for me after he said " can we use my penis as a shovel ?"
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
I just hate that one day I'll have to tell our children how we met, makes me look like a gold digging whore
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know how to make vodka btw in case you want to come over and do a science project
I'm high and I have a consensual booty call on the way and just thought that it was a good time to let you know that I think that you are a stellar person.
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
"This must be what Jayden Smith feels like all the time"
I can't come. It's so cold my uterine walls have frozen together like a cherry popsicle.
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
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