it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
We all know the best way to start a relationship is greeting while at least one of you are intoxicated, dual facebook stalking, and a two week long game of 20 questions via texts to 'really' get to know each other. In that order.
I wouldn't have it any other way. It's like a fairy tale!
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
I woke up this morning peeing out bubbles . I smell like baby wash . What the hell happened .
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
Way to high for badminton right now. This is gonna be a shitshow.
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
I just bought a 1/4 oz of pot from a coworker who's old enough to be my grandfather...I'm never leaving Portland.
Accomplishment of the day: changing my tampon at 38,000 ft with turbulence. Fasten seatbelt sign was definitely on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His fucking flight got canceled because the president stopped at the airport he was flying out of... Fuckin Obama literally just cock blocked me
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
sorry i got drunk at sunday brunch and force fed carrot sticks to your cat
We're about to get drunk and it feels wrong without you
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