Just saw a man jogging. For recreation. At 3am. Who's he training to be, batman?
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
My parents just checked my browsing history and now think I'm addicted to porn and am a necrophiliac. 1: I know it was you. 2: You're so dumped, that shit is sick.
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
He just yelled in the bar, "So I stuck it in two girls butts, why are you bringing that up now?"
There is a full size piano in the middle of our road. Please tell me you had nothing to do with this.
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
My mom has finally acknowledged my soft spot for Russians. Finally.
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
We can stop fighting if you send me a picture of your dick standing at full attention wearing a sock.
I'll wait.
It can also be a hat.
This snow needs to melt so I can get wasted on someones front lawn
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
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