if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
Every time I find out someone else from high school got pregnant accidentally, I want to declare victory over them.
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
Dude idk, apparently telling two drunk chicks 'that's whats up' after watching them lick eachother's face wasn't the compliment they were looking for. I mean I was fucking hammered.
Wow.
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
we are blowing up condoms and making balloons and we’re drunk on the floor. You could have come to school here
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
you got drunk, told him he looked like shaggy and said 'I wouldn't show you my mystery machine for all the scooby snacks in the world'
No one wanted to hang out so vodka and I are hanging out
It's my birthday weekend! I'm getting a Brazilian and he's going to fucking Arkansas. Where the fuck are his priorities?
I'm nothing if not determined to sleep with everyone at that company
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