Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
I projectile vomited into my sink. Jealous?
Kind of. My puke would have just dribbled down my chin and missed the sink completely.
Ohh that happened after I started to cry.
she said "the two best ways to sober up are to nurse someone or give a blowjob" and im gonna go along with it.
Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
He tried to finger me at Disneyland! He tried to taint the happiest place on earth!
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
Woke up the day after the party with a bruise on my stomach. Pretty sure my liver was trying to escape for fear of it's life.
Woman at starbucks on her computer with a garbage bag of popcorn and a bottle of lotion. Where are you coming from?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
I almost got an A in organic chem but started hallucinating during the final so I got a C
Do u have any idea how hard it is to masturbate in a CVS bathroom when your name is being called over the speakers to pick up a prescription for painkillers?
The frequency with which I change my vibrator batteries is getting a little ridiculous....
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
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