omg omg i just fucked paul. i need to stop doing this kind of thing.
wait, who's paul?
exactly.
I just saw at least a dozen senior citizens on roller blades. way to drunk for this.
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
You turned to me, winked, whispered "man the harpoons" and walked out with the fat chick
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
Please assure him that the flying penis statue is for display purposes only.
the only two hours i was sober on this trip and i managed to break my toe. no one will believe this.
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
I just stood beside an Amish man and bought Cocoa Krispies and tampons.
They left me at home... I'm a liability
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
Randomize
