If I had a sex resume I'd get tons of jobs.
It's amazing how much jurassic park has contributed to my life recently
Public safety found my id!
And i can't find my bra so i'm assuming they found my bra with my id which would explain the disapproving tone the lady on the phone had.
you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
As I was about to go to sleep he asked me if I was ready to 69. HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK AT HIM IN THE FACE OVER DINNER TOMORROW
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
I tried to breakup with him by telling I had a threesome. He one upped me by saying he had a 5-some so I couldn’t do it.
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