his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
I'm hungover as fuck. My vagina hurts. I locked my keys in my car. It's about 93* outside. We're having sex in the pool when I get home
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
Every bar we ever go to has a woman there who hates him. Getting so much vagina has never seemed so not glorious
Halfway through lecture, some kid in the front row threw up IN his hands. Professor held the door for him to carry it out.
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
THERE IS WEED IN MY OVEN. HOW AM I EVER SUPPOSED TO MAKE CHICKEN PARMESAN WITH WEED IN MY OVEN.
She broke up with me after I spent the whole day speaking in nothing but Marshawn Lynch quotes.
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
He asked when the last time I had sex was. I had to look at the clock and respond "12 hours ago"
Can now check off "Start bar fight with my dad." on my bucket list.
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
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