Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
Problem: At home sick with a stomach virus. Solution: smoke weed all day...
Pants on the Ground is the theme song of my life
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
you kept saying "no santa, im not having sex with you. it's not your holiday".
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
Ps, did you know if you google "drunk jenga", you're the first image that shows up?
Someone just got pizza delivered to the liquor store.
Sex on the scooter in the parking lot wasn't the smartest idea. Actual quote from the cop as he handed me the ticket and fist bumped me.
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
I really wish you were home bc youre the only friend I could ask to use an at home waxing kit on my vagina. I need you.
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
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