We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
scratched cornea got me an eyepatch and a blowjob from a girl with a thing for pirates
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
I should put together a new mom basket for her. It would have diapers, vodka, ambien, and tissues for when she cries about her wasted youth.
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
THIS CHICK IS LIKE SOME SORT OF HOOKER HOUDINI.
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
I just saw a cat, if i ate those mushrooms 15 minutes earlier i wouldn't have made it to the bar
I'm just glad you didn't end up in Staten Island
I woke up naked holding a taco. My ass couldn't even make it to my bed let alone Staten Island
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
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