I pooped in a mop bucket.
WTF???
Their employee restroom was locked what kind of customer service is that
omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
you convinced me to pee myself because I was wearing dark jeans.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I love memorial day. It's drinking in the name of patriotism. God Bless America
She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
Just heard an advertisement for 40 proof chocolate milk. We may never have to grow up
The salesman looked at me like I was crazy when I explained the need for a headboard that had slats so I could handcuff people to it
You claimed your dick was a divining rod, spun in a circle 3 times and walked into the bar you stopped in front of...consequently there was a bikini shoot going on
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pretty sure I picked a cat up off the street and took him home with me, fed him tuna, then let him go
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
i texted "amiibo vore" to my insurance agent instead of someone else. do you think they'll raise my rates out of disgust?
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
My favorite part was making you pull out your lucky steelers vibrator and show it to jerome bettis at the bar
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