Pants on the Ground is the theme song of my life
I opened my door to go to class and all there was was a raccoon puking on the doorstep. In hindsight, it was a very accurate omen.
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
Jesus once told his disciples that its better to hang out with your best friend than give some douche bag a bj.
He took a shot, then proceeded to puke into the bucket he was iceing his broken foot in
Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
you sternly forced jackson to start preheating the oven around midnight so you could make bagels in the morning
you were serious about those bagels
There's so much mac and cheese stuck to my foot right now
I'm drunk eating a quesadilla while this kid is tryina come over and I'm just like no. I want the quesadilla.
I woke up with broken tostitos all over my bed and a snap chat of myself flipping off the camera.
I'm pretty sure I smell like alcoholism and shame. And it's not a pretty scent.
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