can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
I feel like my vagina stays drunk longer than the rest of me. It's always super sensitive and hungry the day after drinking.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
iphones do not disturb setting is the biggest cock block to my 3am booty calls
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
She was purple for Halloween. She literally spray-painted herself purple and called it a costume. It won't come off.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
Ran into my statistics professor at the bar, he chugged a car bomb and yelled "x bar mothfucker!". On average I'm loving this PhD program.
I am more than mildly offended he didn't screenshot the snapchat of my boobs.
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
Randomize