i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
I only kidnapped one of them. chill
you were carrying around a glass of vodka telling everyone it was Russian water
Pretty sure I just slept with Elmo.
in hindsight, $10 Malibu buckets were a terrible idea...
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
Handle of 100 proof captain dressed like a pilgrim here we go
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
So ive narrowed my options down to getting food or masturbating. Don't judge me
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
i like coming up with different names when i reference that night. 'the night i got kicked out of the bar', 'the night i escaped from the hospital', 'the night we had that threeway'...
Randomize
