She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
I walked in on her just letting her nose bleed into her friend's hands
They get 5 minutes to wear their speedos at the wedding
Oh my god I'll have to be really drunk for that
Oh man. Realized I was high when I realized how long I'd been watching Roseanne
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sleeping in bed with your booty calls married sister...you're the stuff heroes are made of.
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
You're putting the star player on the bench. You dont put Michael Jordan on the bench.
Are you referring to my vagina as Michael Jordan?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
Is it bad that when someone says the phrase "helicopter dick" I immediately think of you?
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
I just realized. I havent even gotten a paycheck from this new job yet and already laid one of the girls most of the dudes are after
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
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