Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
I thought Christmas was going to come before I did
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
I take back everything I said about communal showers
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
If this herpes test comes back negative I'm asking out the doctor.
I don't like getting sloppy drunk but I don't like getting just half drunk either, I'm way too responsible if my blood alcohol level is below 0.2
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
Are you jealous of my sweatsuit? It's how I get men on Tinder.
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
Sorry I bailed on you yesterday. I was propositioned.
And you don't turn down margaritas and oral.
I miss seeing you
i hope for the sake of your safety you were not with your girlfriend while sending texts like that at 3 am
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