That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
I would kind of like a job that starts at 10:30 and i'll work til 7. I'm not very productive in the morning. My main focus is not puking from 9-11.
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
Oh, I'm sorry. I'd rather be "doable" than "the fat chick"
gross. I think i'll just donate all my eggs. My children will be incredible, but they're not welcome in my womb
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
Are you wearing clothes?
Fuck no, who do you think I am
Did I fall on/off the boat yesterday? Cuz my right leg looks and feels like if it got hit by shrapnel.
Life is when you're laying naked in bed, eating Double Stuff Oreos with your boyfriend, blazed as fuck. Happy 4/20.
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
Tip: never mention Guy Fieri during sex
I give all credit to my lucky thong, there's never a time I haven't gotten laid while wearing it
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
My professor just told my lab he could drive us around town in his 1991 Lincoln towncar limo for our bar crawl. This just keeps getting better!
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
Randomize