Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
i am so afraid to go to the bathroom. i am afraid i am going to fall asleep on the toillet.
Special does not even begin to describe that text.
Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
I just saw a guy getting escorted with handcuffs on, I'm too drunk to be at the airport right now.
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
You know how I know last night was a good night? Because I remember high fiving a couple WHILE they were having sex.
When you didn't respond I figured you must be busy so I'm home in my pj's 2 beers in and stoned from weed I got from my gaybours. They also gave me cake. I'm not moving from this recliner.
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
Just woke up next to a hungry lesbian and a half eaten croissant on my stomach. Can you come get me?
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